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Semi-annual hungover moving violation ticket time again. Not quite as much fun as a Victoria's Secret Fashion show. Selected police officer commentary includes:

What's wrong with you?

You mad at the world?

You mad at your mom?

You mad at your boyfriend?

Big Sunkist fan, huh?*

You blow a tire in this thing going 101 miles an hour and you're going to die, ma'am.

I attribute the 500 dollar ticket I was slapped with to two things: 1. My slept-in face looking like a Salvador Dali painting, and 2. My father's name alongside mine on the title which inevitably leads to the officer thinking I'm married, resulting in an abrupt end to flirtation. Possible anti-orange soda motive exists as well. See footnote.

*Was clutching a liter of it.


( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Feb. 1st, 2010 12:41 am (UTC)
which one of my defenses says admissible in a court of law to you?
Jan. 31st, 2010 07:38 pm (UTC)
you obviously weren't going fa...hey wait a minute...
Feb. 1st, 2010 12:42 am (UTC)
i briefly considered some thelma and louise shit.
Feb. 1st, 2010 06:45 am (UTC)
everyone does girl. would've been pretty sweet to go on a 2 hour car rampage, kill a whole load of people and then end up on death row with people like me writing to your department saying GOD FORGIVES ALL!
Jan. 31st, 2010 08:36 pm (UTC)
I'm going with the anti-orange soda motive.
Feb. 1st, 2010 12:43 am (UTC)
me too. he asked if i had anything illegal in the car aside from "gross tasting orange soda."
Feb. 1st, 2010 01:58 am (UTC)
What a jerk.
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )