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Local Businesses, Boyfriends.

My boyfriend plays countless games involving zombies or at least that include a special secret undercover zombie level, and they've made me keenly accustomed to hearing the drone of the undead. As such, I was instantly able to recognize it in Safeway the other morning when I was desperately clacking around in my work heels looking for a birthday candle to stick in the lopsided birthday cake I'd picked up seconds earlier for a woman I'm close to in the office. I asked the lady in the gift station surrounded by balloons and decorative cacti where the birthday candles were. She grunted without looking up.

"Bakery, under the cakes, do you want me to show you."

No inflection, no tone, all zombie. Disturbed, I shook my head and backed away toward the bakery I'd just come from. Once there, I was rooting around beneath the cakes for a suitable "damn, you're getting old" candle when another employee shuffled up to me and asked if I needed any help.

"No, thank you, well...do you know where the cards are?"

"Aisle 5, next to the candy. Do you want me to show you."

I flinched and grabbed the first candle within the grip of my fingers, which happened to be Jasmine of Aladdin fame. I didn't care. I just wanted the hell out of there. It worked out anyway, because the chick we were celebrating was fresh off the boat from a month-long Disney cruise. Happy birthday.

It's queer to me to sit beside a boyfriend on the couch playing zombie games who doesn't need to be driven to the airport within the hour to return to New York or New Jersey or New Guinea or wherever he was flown in from. Still learning what it's like when neither of us are going anywhere.

Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
vukecard
Apr. 9th, 2011 01:05 pm (UTC)
excellent articles, useful for me. keep writing and happy blogging.

hatchelt
Apr. 10th, 2011 07:22 pm (UTC)
oh you lying cow Vuke, you told me she'd gone soft and lost her edginess since the boyfriend!
velouria
Apr. 11th, 2011 12:56 am (UTC)
I'm still edgy, damn it.
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )