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90 Days?

3 months sobersaurus on the 4th (tomorrow), but I ask you, Journal, are you really sobersaurus if you’re smoking wax and consequently pissing yourself laughing at your friends the Rivera brothers when they imitate a bullfrog in their backyard?

My vice of choice is alcohol, and it is what I’ve been stearing clear of the last 3 months. I’m proud of myself for avoiding what I’ve been so dependent on for the last 10 years, but I just feel a little ehh about declaring myself sobersaurus when I’ve obviously sought out a head change or two to replace it.

The good news is, I don’t like pissing myself so I don’t have any dependency problem on this. The slapping bouncers and the yakking in my bed that alcohol caused was somehow okay with me though for whatever reason. Thus I continued using it.

I also like to drink mocktails in the evenings, which my boyfriend finds unnerving, but I don’t see a problem with other than that they’re sugary and fattening and when I reach for my glasses in the morning I knock them over and spill red shit all over my Ikea faux sheep rug.

Soon everything I drink will come straining back out my toothless mouth anyway, so there won’t be any issue with that. Toothal Massacre Saturday morning. Wish me luck.