Velouria (velouria) wrote,

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Give me strength and self-control. Give me heart and give me soul.

I went home mentally unstable today. I got up and mumbled something to my boss about having a headache and left. Too many pregnant girls in my face.  Too many grandbabies being born. Too many idiots shouting HOW ARRRRE YOOOU in the copy room like they actually fucking care. There comes a point where I can't physically make myself act like I care about any of it. Especially not when I have a Jew-fro and I've smeared my eyeliner crying. That point was about 11:30 AM after I'd finished stuffing stuffed-crust frozen pizza in my face.

I'm glad I left work, because I managed to clean up my kitchen and sit on the porch for a bit in the unoffensive weather. I came back in, opened up all windows and played old Coldplay albums until I felt sane again. Now I guess I'm competent enough to go back to work and get incompetent again.

I'm trying really hard not to buy a new wig, a 500-pack of candles, or any more Halloween decorations with what little money I have remaining. Everyone says I need a hobby. I tried reading my giant Edgar Allen Poe book 'cause tis the season, but I got really pissed off the first paragraph in. I couldn't understand a Goddamn thing he was writing. So I flipped to the poems where I fared better. Who doesn't understand The Raven?
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