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Destiny is calling me.

Pseudo-Brad came in with the wifey. I didn't even have time to freak out having been so engrossed in my article about Brad Pitt and Jennifer Anniston's breakup. (Ironic, no?)

He told her, "This girl never smiles." She said, "That's not true, you're making her smile right now." This was one part because he was doing a retarded little dance and singing along to the Foreigner song over the speakers and one part because I grin like an idiot when he is within a ten mile radius of the building.

Wifey and I then got in a conversation about GrapeNuts while he went to get his own cigarettes. The whole twenty seconds we discussed the fact that GrapeNuts look and taste like gravel, I felt guilty. Guilty because I was not at all concerned with breakfast cereal, but rather my shock at how unattractive she was. I could only think of how easy it could be to seduce her husband the next time he returns without her.

Wrong, wrong, wrong.


( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
Jan. 20th, 2005 09:24 pm (UTC)
Grapenuts suck. The first and only time I ate them, I took one bite, gagged, and shoved them into the garbage disposal which I didn't turn on because I didn't want my mom finding out that I'd wasted food. So I put a dish-washing sponge over the disposal. Later, my mom comes down and notices the sponge and, looking under it, discovers a pile of soggy Grapenuts. We were half an hour late for school and work respectively because I insisted that my sister did it until I got tired of lying. Grapenuts ruined my life.
Jan. 21st, 2005 01:08 am (UTC)
wowgoons play on mal'ganis
Jan. 21st, 2005 06:23 am (UTC)
wwaaa waaa waa wa
Jan. 21st, 2005 06:22 am (UTC)
well then. you would get along with myself, pseudo-brad, and his wife. possibly their children.
Jan. 22nd, 2005 12:58 am (UTC)
What, you mean like a love-sextangle? I dunno, I don't care for children much.
Jan. 22nd, 2005 06:30 am (UTC)
get along with as in dislike grapenuts mutually. weirdo.
Jan. 22nd, 2005 07:26 am (UTC)
I don't know. How long could we maintain a relastionship established around hating cereal?
Jan. 21st, 2005 03:37 pm (UTC)
i miss you
Jan. 21st, 2005 10:07 pm (UTC)
i miss joo too. why can't we ever kick it one of those times you're flying all over the globe?
from dating dumb men lately, i've learned that "kick it" means to spend the whole time trying to make out with me.
maybe we need a new adjective.
Jan. 23rd, 2005 12:18 pm (UTC)
shit baby, I'll fly across the country to kick it witchew any time.
Jan. 24th, 2005 08:34 am (UTC)
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )