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Help Wanted.

Every time I get on AIM, I have about a dozen new buddies. They're all obnoxious bots, but I don't know that when I'm ragingly drunk. So I'm squinting at it, racking my brain trying to figure out which long lost internet boyfriend it is that I've since entered into a cold war with.

Colleen: I STILL LOVE YOU
USA TODAY: Welcome to USA TODAY on AIM!
Colleen: LETS MAKE IT WORK
USA TODAY: Select an option:
1. My USA TODAY News Alerts
2. Top News Headlines
3. Search Top News
4. Help

Then I hit my head on the monitor and pass out. I think "4" would've been the way to go.

Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
jonn68
May. 16th, 2008 02:35 pm (UTC)
Obnoxious bots never make friends with me. :(
velouria
May. 16th, 2008 11:42 pm (UTC)
you can have USA TODAY. good listener, terrible lover.
jonn68
May. 17th, 2008 05:06 am (UTC)
Oh, I don't ask for much. As long as it actually looks me in the eye during.
daddylovebucket
May. 17th, 2008 04:27 am (UTC)
you talk to usa today more than me. :(
velouria
May. 17th, 2008 04:43 am (UTC)
well USA TODAY and i have a son together. we have to talk about parent/teacher conferences and whatnot. but you know i make time for you, baby.
daddylovebucket
May. 21st, 2008 04:36 am (UTC)
is your son's name Puerto Rico?

my time from you get shorter everytime. ;)
velouria
May. 21st, 2008 04:57 am (UTC)
his name is TIME, and he's very expensive to fed-ex to his father every other weekend.
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )