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Oh My Golly.

Found my Diary of Doom whilst digging through a drawer of ugly shirts I never wear in desperation this morning due to not having done laundry in a month. Hooray.

Noticed that my cable company has an entire OnDemand section dedicated to "Yule Logs" and "Winter Scenery" featuring the sound of fires crackling and snow falling and wind blowing and whatnot. So I put it on and fell asleep, only to wake up half an hour later to the sound of the OnDemand lady yelling at the top of her lungs about why I should watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians (Kim's hitting the gym to work out to lose weight for her Playboy pictorial). Nice strategy, aholes. Very relaxing.

Seemed to have destroyed the copy machine at work when I participated in copying my Lunch Girlfriend's daughter's face and her stuffed bunny rabbit all day the Wednesday before Thanksgiving when no one was there.  It's not like they don't know either, because we tacked the pictures up all over my office. I'm going to be hanged or otherwise executed some time soon by the state of California, and I can't say I really care. I will be a martyr for shitty state employees, whatever. My diary will sell better.

Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
jonn68
Dec. 3rd, 2008 04:02 pm (UTC)
Copy machines don't die. They just get reincarnated as fax machines.

You need to add a security device to the Diary of Doom, just in case.

*BZZZZZZT* "Access denied!"
velouria
Dec. 5th, 2008 03:00 pm (UTC)
well i also broke that trying to fax shit to my phone. long story.
jonn68
Dec. 5th, 2008 07:06 pm (UTC)
Oops.

Can they track it and tell it was being sent to your phone? If not, plead the fifth!
phantomplanet
Dec. 15th, 2008 07:42 pm (UTC)
how much for the diary ;)
velouria
Dec. 16th, 2008 01:27 am (UTC)
i'm out of the closet now if you want to come take advantage of me.
phantomplanet
Dec. 19th, 2008 07:41 pm (UTC)
i do, actually
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )