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Well we moved at work. Again. And now I'm navigating 3 different freeways with 3 million different douchebags and the sun in my face both ways. To make matters worse, I'm going from the ghetto (where I live) into the burbs (where I now work) and back. Who the hell does that? I live in the ghetto so that I can drive 3 miles within 5 minutes to get to my place of business.

I need to move anyway. I came home the other night and found my bedroom door closed. I never do that. Never ever, never never never. So I clutched my keychain mace and knocked on it. "Hello?" I called, to no response. I slowly cracked it open to find Von Fluffy munching on sunflower seeds and looking mildly terrified. If only she could speak of the horrors that she witnessed. I may contact a hamster whisperer.

I figure it's the dead, the undead, or the maintenance man digging through my underwear drawer. I actually gave him permission to enter a couple weeks ago so that he could fix my garbage disposal while I was at work. That night, I found a note beside a busted up pile of shot glass that read, "Shot glasses r not disposable. U will be charged 75 bucks if u do it again. Thnx."

It must have been that moment that he fell in love with me and would later return to enter my apartment and dick around in my bedroom.

Comments

( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
velouria
Jan. 18th, 2009 11:25 pm (UTC)
hyuck hyuck.
(Deleted comment)
velouria
Jan. 19th, 2009 01:54 am (UTC)
can you get me into obamarama?
(Deleted comment)
velouria
Jan. 19th, 2009 05:29 am (UTC)
i just meant the inauguration. but if you want to make me secretary of something, that's cool too.
botrinks
Jan. 18th, 2009 11:18 pm (UTC)
Go Leon on the maintenace man...



... I wish i had the sun in my eyes both ways from work - i live in england - mushrooms see more light than me right now.
velouria
Jan. 18th, 2009 11:30 pm (UTC)
i think leon is my maintenance man.

sorry about your sun situation. you can borrow some of mine.
jonn68
Jan. 19th, 2009 12:27 am (UTC)
Did he actually write in LOL/textspeak like that?
velouria
Jan. 19th, 2009 01:55 am (UTC)
yes. he didn't say LOL though, for some reason. i find it hilarious.
daddylovebucket
Jan. 19th, 2009 06:26 am (UTC)
He wears your underwear and does camshows from your bed.
velouria
Jan. 19th, 2009 04:53 pm (UTC)
i doubt anyone would notice the difference.
stephanieseon
Feb. 25th, 2009 03:19 am (UTC)
You make me laugh out loud, literally. People probably think I'm retarded when I'm reading your entries.
velouria
Feb. 25th, 2009 04:05 am (UTC)
why, are you in the public library or something?
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )