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Lady I can't stand came in my door at work, smiled fakely, and told me I smelled just like blueberry muffins. I didn't punch her in the face strictly because it was Friday.

Blurgh.

I have a new phone on a new (shoddier) network, which may or may not facilitate texting international internet boyfriends. Or anyone for that matter. I just couldn't physically tolerate the smug bastards at Verizon telling me their shitty plans hadn't changed in 3 years and I'd have to sign my life away just to get the same one.

So everyone send me a naked photo of themselves and let's hope we're still good.

Comments

( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
jonn68
Aug. 1st, 2009 04:10 am (UTC)
Damn you're smooth.

If you really smell like blueberry muffins, you have won me over, for how little that is worth (zero).
velouria
Aug. 1st, 2009 06:14 pm (UTC)
i just realized the lotion i had on was "berrylicious," so i guess she had a valid point. i still want to deck her.
jonn68
Aug. 1st, 2009 09:12 pm (UTC)
Oh, I'm advocating the decking - I'm just sayin'.
daddylovebucket
Aug. 1st, 2009 04:22 am (UTC)
how am I suppose to send nudities if I don't know your number?
velouria
Aug. 1st, 2009 06:14 pm (UTC)
867-5309.
daddylovebucket
Aug. 1st, 2009 06:30 pm (UTC)
whomever is on the other end is really enjoying what I'm sending them.
velouria
Aug. 1st, 2009 06:51 pm (UTC)
jenny dude.
(Deleted comment)
velouria
Aug. 1st, 2009 06:17 pm (UTC)
you can't send pictures on that thing but you can launch nuclear weapons with it? are you for real?!
(Deleted comment)
velouria
Aug. 1st, 2009 07:03 pm (UTC)
that is the most retarculous thing i have ever heard. my ass bleeds for you.
hatchelt
Aug. 3rd, 2009 03:09 pm (UTC)
sorry, the boy i get all the naked photos off wont send them to me anymore, so i cant pass them onto you and pretend they're me.
velouria
Aug. 4th, 2009 12:26 am (UTC)
well then give me his number.
hatchelt
Aug. 4th, 2009 05:42 am (UTC)
...i cant. he's dead.
velouria
Aug. 4th, 2009 11:52 pm (UTC)
you try calpol?
hatchelt
Aug. 5th, 2009 06:42 am (UTC)
he's over the age of 5, calpol loses all powers by then
( 14 comments — Leave a comment )